No, I do not want to buy your tree... or your beer.

Every photo tells a story. Will this one certainly does. I was walking around the local park wanting to take pictures of trees with the sun either in front or behind them. You can see the full set of photos at Flickr in the set Desaturated Trees.

I came across the tree on the left and notice how the light picked out every feature of this dead massive plant. I took a few shots and was then approached by two men in track suits who were carrying bottles of beer disguised as brown paper bags.

'That will be a pound mate.' the first pillar of the community said, 'We live in this park so it is our tree.'

I shook my head and said 'I will give you a pound each if you can climb to the top of it.' This gave me two options, they would either fall off and snap a few bones or both of them would get to the top where I would then take a picture and pelt them with stones. Large ones, with a serrated edge.

Even after they had dropped the price to a bargain of 20 pence I still refused and moved on, not believing his story about how birds are nesting in the tree.. its winter you idiot...

Remember, there will always be at least one nutter in every local park. If you look around and you cannot see one.. its you.